Dear Mr. Landsman


I’m applying to join a team of environmentally-minded underwater mortuary technicians. We’re going to be operating under a strict set of kosher laws in the waters off Anchorage, burying the pets of wealthy Jews in a coral reef that will reclaim carbon from the decomposing bodies. It’s part of a larger plan to offset carbon emissions in Sitka. I was really hoping I could use you as a reference.

Sincerely and Respectfully,
Twiggy L. Chevaliér

PS – At some point I’m going to need to reclaim my Sitka World’s Fair memorial shot glass. And Berko’s tomahawk.


2 thoughts on “Dear Mr. Landsman

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s